It is very refreshing to see a good number of teens, young adults and adults being so care free about "gender".

There is no "role" to play in life-- there is only a way of "being" in life. Is something I always say to myself to remind me that I have a purpose and that I have much more to learn.

I am a transgendered individual, however most of the times I really wonder if I even fit that definition anymore because I'm such a "radical". I have chosen to not undergo surgery and not take any hormones simply because since dressing as a female everyday, working and living, that people simply accept me for "me".

My "being" doesn't offend anyone and I attract much more positive things into my life than negative with the way I live my day to day life. So I'm among the fortunate ones.. I know of too many transgendered individuals of previous generations and some even of my own generation, go through a lot of pain and grief.

Times have changed and I have smartened up!

Although I am very free-spirited and fluid minded, I still can not grasp fully the idea of "gender non specific".. To me my gender is quite important because it is "who I feel I am" on the inside and so my outside totally reflects it and expresses it fully. I definitely feel "female" and I definitely identify with being female. I have simply adapted my body to my mind and spirit I guess is what I'm trying to say.. The way my body moves and my mannerisms are all very natural to me and do not feel forced.

I do not have shape shifting abilities to feel male or female upon impulse when I'm with or attracted to a guy.. I am a "straight" woman when it comes to sexual attraction I am very much attracted to males.

On my journey there have been many interesting questions and ideas from people that I found helped to strengthen me and solidify who I am.. A really common question is:

"If you feel really feminine and you don't want to have surgery or anything and you were born with male parts and you are only attracted to me.. Doesn't that make you a fem-gay?"

My response to that is a smile and then a burst of laughter! It makes me feel really good inside that to some people I am such an enigma -- I love it!! *Hahahahahaaa*.

First of all, I do not feel very feminine; I am feminine. Why have surgery when you have "magic". *Winks*. I love my male parts so do the guys I have ever met and non of them who have been with me were gay or turned gay. I am not a "fem-gay" becaues I do not identify with that way of being and the lifestyle.

Living life the way I am and being just the way I am has so far been a really really interesting journey. I witness the most amazing sides of people when the topic is brought up, especially with men. Women find it the hardest to understand I have found, they are deeper thinking. Men just think with their penises, I guess that is why! *Hahahahahaa*. There have been a lot of men who have really open themselves. I can accept that perhaps my being transgendered opens mens up to their homosexual being? That they can explore that side of themselves more comfortably with a transgendered person than a feminite gay man?

Mind you I don't go up to every guy out there and say hey theres a surprise coming! I'm quite opposite. Depending on the guy and how comfortable he makes me feel and how insightful and mature he is about all the topics I bring up, I don't actually share that with anyone for a period of time.. Ofcourse 9 times out of 10 people already have assumed anyway so, less work for me yay!

I get to just concentrate on being me and people are perfectly fine with that -- so thank you.

Right on Stevie!!!

Even my former doctor had this really confused look on her face, when I said "Yeah the hormones are working great, but my cock won't work" She was like why do you care if it does or not don't you want to be a girl. My answer was sort of, because if I said no I just want to be me, I had a very real fear she would cut off my estrogen pills(pills that I love by the way) I replied to her, I want to be someone who looks like a women, but has a nice cock between her legs. That was a few years back, the doc I have now understands my fluid gender identity, and realize that hormones make me happy and are an end with in themselves. The whole Tranny System you described is so true, I even know trannies who state "after I get surgery I am no longer a TG, no longer a part of the community" I call that a delusion, the only members of the TG community I seem to be able to get along with are a few girls who care not about surgery, but about just looking fabulous, whose only care in the world is the clothes they are buying not what they call themselves. I'm a Gender Queer, and if there was a third neutral pronoun that was in everyday use I would use it, hell I prefer It over he or she, but people say that is insulting. Using either of those is insulting to me.

i also for the past few years (and longer when i realize my youth's struggles) have been struggling with my gender role...i am a female-bodied queer and have played with my "male' or masculine persona, yet never feel like a "man" when i am in drag, but i have now come to think of "girl-clothes" as drag...i am getting more and more confused, yet also exploring more possibilities than the typical diagnosis of a "man trapped in a womans body". i have many trans friends and trans ally friends and i have talked with them extensively on their experiences and identities, and it seems that most have gone through the system and have fully transitioned...i know only a few people who do not have clear intention of transitioning. i feel androgynous and sometimes asexual, and i have so few peers in this position. it is so refreshing and inspiring to come upon this page where there is discussion of something different, fluid and ever-changing. i am happy for the most part in my body, and i feel that my body is also trans/androgynous, and i need my masculinity and queerness to be recognized by partners and friends, as well as validating my faggy feminine self. i am trying and beginning to understand how i fit within my body and my sense of self. it is confusing to people(and to myself) trying to understand androgeny, when we grow up in a binary world and have few or no models for ambiguity, exploration, strangeness or difference. thanks to y'all for exploring, expressing and sharing!!! hopefully with other happily ambiguous genderqueers as role models,less and less people will have to mold themselves to the binary system in order to get what they need to be themselves.